The days...
Thursday, February 26, 2009 4:32 PM
are almost done.
Yet still they're going on, and on, and on...
_____________
I took one step forward onto the slat.
Another.
Another.
Then I looked down.
I couldn't do it.
At least I wasn't squealing quite as badly as her.
"Come on!
God you guys are such wusses!"
He stood with his hand on his hip, beckoning us to follow.
We protested.
He laughed and walked out further.
She got to the third slat,
I had to walk her back.
I only felt the courage to walk across when I felt as if I were saving her.
She was more terrified than I was.
Poor thing.
He just kept yelling,
kept calling,
kept begging.
He didn't want to be out there alone.
"I wish I had friends who weren't such losers!
It's not scary!!"
She and I walked back to where we had left out bags,
we left him there.
Out on the tracks, where he tried to walk back,
slipped.
Broke his leg.
Couldn't get up.
He was 300 or 400 feet off the ground.
His twisted leg dangled.
Then the whistle blew.
She and I looked at each other and ran,
faster than we ever thought possible.
Tripped numerous amounts of times.
Slat after slat we ran.
She tripped,
I kept running.
Heavy breathing started, I could see his head.
He was screaming.
I started screaming.
She started to cry.
I ran across the slats,
every one of them.
I ran across the seemingly bottomless fall.
I could hear the train.
Chug...chug..
It saw her,
the whistle blew again,
it told her to move out of the way.
I tried so hard.
So..
so hard..
I couldn't get him out.
He was heavier than I.
She came out of no where and pulled me away,
we almost fell.
The train flew past us.
And that was the end of him.
_____________________________________
End of the dream I had after skipping school with two friends.
We played on the tracks,
no one got hurt.
But man we were scared.
I got home,
Dad says I have to visit the school psychologist.
Who needs help?
Not me.
Moonlighting aside
7:52 AM
She really needs his money.
One.
Two.
Three.
Four.
Damn pin.
Dear to you and yours,
Put your hand on the skin
The one that's cold?
Yeah.
Do it.
Imagine that you never knew them.
Imagine everything is alright.
Sincerely yours.
But not really.
[Carrying the legacy:
Letter C:
The Cab - Bounce!
Cake - Frank Sinatra
Cheap Trick - I want you to want me
Cobra Starship - Damn You Look Good and I'm Drunk
Coldplay - The Scientist
The Color Fred - Hate to See You Go
Crash Romeo - Get up, Shut up
Cute is what we aim for - Risque]
One.
Two.
Three.
Four.
Damn pin.
Dear to you and yours,
Put your hand on the skin
The one that's cold?
Yeah.
Do it.
Imagine that you never knew them.
Imagine everything is alright.
Sincerely yours.
But not really.
[Carrying the legacy:
Letter C:
The Cab - Bounce!
Cake - Frank Sinatra
Cheap Trick - I want you to want me
Cobra Starship - Damn You Look Good and I'm Drunk
Coldplay - The Scientist
The Color Fred - Hate to See You Go
Crash Romeo - Get up, Shut up
Cute is what we aim for - Risque]
Talk to the mirror
Tuesday, February 24, 2009 8:01 AM
Choke back tears.
Something about nitroglycerin.
I know I never update, but I do read all of your updates.
ALL of them.
8 more days.
:)
Let's hope it's a good one.
[Carrying on the legacy:
B is for:
Black Flag -I Don't Care
Boys like Girls - Hero/Heroine
The Beatles - Eleanor Rigby]
Something about nitroglycerin.
I know I never update, but I do read all of your updates.
ALL of them.
8 more days.
:)
Let's hope it's a good one.
[Carrying on the legacy:
B is for:
Black Flag -I Don't Care
Boys like Girls - Hero/Heroine
The Beatles - Eleanor Rigby]
If I just lay here...
Saturday, February 21, 2009 3:15 PM
Would you lay with me?
And just forget the world.
I can't believe you.
Humanity?
I thought it existed.
I thought you were perfect.
Three weeks.
We'll see.
We'll hope.
And you,
you.
Yes.
I love you.
All of you.
Thank you all for existing.
Anyone who takes the time to care about me just a little.
Sometimes I forget how lucky I am.
[This is for carrying on the legacy:
A is for:
All Time Low - Umbrella [Rihanna cover]
Anberlin - The Unwinding Cable Car
The Ataris - Song for a Mix Tape
AFI - The Leaving Song pt. 2
and The Academy Is... - Everything We Had]
[Feel free to participate.]
And just forget the world.
I can't believe you.
Humanity?
I thought it existed.
I thought you were perfect.
Three weeks.
We'll see.
We'll hope.
And you,
you.
Yes.
I love you.
All of you.
Thank you all for existing.
Anyone who takes the time to care about me just a little.
Sometimes I forget how lucky I am.
[This is for carrying on the legacy:
A is for:
All Time Low - Umbrella [Rihanna cover]
Anberlin - The Unwinding Cable Car
The Ataris - Song for a Mix Tape
AFI - The Leaving Song pt. 2
and The Academy Is... - Everything We Had]
[Feel free to participate.]
I missed your skin when you were east...
Saturday, February 7, 2009 9:18 PM
you clicked your heels and wished for me.
Lack of an update,
but I made a commitment to myself.
*cough*
*cough*
*cough*
ow.
Lack of an update, but I made a commitment to myself.
*cough*
*cough*
*cough*
ow.
You're not in it alone
Friday, February 6, 2009 10:18 PM
Thank you for everything.
"And I'd like to thank my gorgeous girlfriend.
I couldn't have made it this far without her
love and support. Hun, I love you."
I'm not worried, it'll happen.
__________________________________
You're...Pregnant..?
I don't know what to think.
All I can remember is the girl in my English class.
"So..how far are you..?"
She smiles at me pleasantly.
She's a pretty girl.
Only because of the make up.
"About three months. You can't really see anything right now though."
And I thought she was just fat.
You can't help but feel a bit sorry for her.
Wonder what she looks like without the mask of foundation?
Without the tons of eyeliner?
"Ohh."
I smile back, then I turn around.
__________________________________
Images of a girl chained up run through my mind.
She screams from the acid.
Blood fills the jar.
She can't find the lock.
I hold my breath.
Her ribs are ripped from her body.
Don't watch Saw.
"And I'd like to thank my gorgeous girlfriend.
I couldn't have made it this far without her
love and support. Hun, I love you."
I'm not worried, it'll happen.
__________________________________
You're...Pregnant..?
I don't know what to think.
All I can remember is the girl in my English class.
"So..how far are you..?"
She smiles at me pleasantly.
She's a pretty girl.
Only because of the make up.
"About three months. You can't really see anything right now though."
And I thought she was just fat.
You can't help but feel a bit sorry for her.
Wonder what she looks like without the mask of foundation?
Without the tons of eyeliner?
"Ohh."
I smile back, then I turn around.
__________________________________
Images of a girl chained up run through my mind.
She screams from the acid.
Blood fills the jar.
She can't find the lock.
I hold my breath.
Her ribs are ripped from her body.
Don't watch Saw.
We all wanna change your head
Thursday, February 5, 2009 8:14 PM
Another loose lock of hair fell in front of his eyes.
His fingers brushed it away gently, but it only fell again.
The tip broke on the end of his pen as he wrote.
"You know, it doesn't help that you won't get your hair cut.."
A boy sitting on the floor next to him spoke aloud.
He ignored him and continued on with his business, once more pushing away the bothersome hair.
"Please Cake, you don't eat..you don't sleep.."
The boy picked at the carpet as he said this.
He rubbed at his eyes, tired as anything.
"..."
The boy, glanced at the armchair.
He used to see him differently.
Not so much a skinny, mess of hair and ink stained hands,
but a friend.
His back quivered, his hands flew across the page.
"damn.."
He whispered.
"...out of paper.."
Finally he turned to look at the poor boy,
his face was a light pink and his eyes a dark red.
In the silence, the sounds of tears hitting the floor could be heard.
He reached his hand out,
his mouth opened as if to say something.
Comforting perhaps,
maybe a, "Are you alright?"
or, "Do you need tissue?"
The boy's shoulders began to heave,
a sob escaping his lips.
He pulled his hand back and he only watched.
Tear after tear fell.
His eyebrows came together.
They hit the floor.
He couldn't imagine what could have possibly caused this.
A whine.
"Hey.."
The boy looked up, his face a mess of wet and red.
"How about..a movie?"
The boy shook his head and stood, his eyes averted.
He stood as well.
The boy turned around and walked into the next room.
His white converse were kicked to side on the way, they had long since turned a dark gray.
He looked around.
He shut his eyes.
He opened them.
He look towards the door of the next room.
He knew what needed to be done.
The next morning,
he came down the stairs,
the boy was reading a novel,
his hand held a crushed tissue.
He walked into the room.
The boy didn't acknowledge his presence.
He took a couple steps forward,
his new shoes pinched so bad.
He lifted the boy's chin.
The boy's eyes fell on a well dressed brunette who looked like he had finally eaten.
His shirt was clean.
His pants were ironed.
His shoes fit.
As for His eyes, he still looked as if he hadn't slept.
He leaned forward and kissed the boy with the tear streaked face.
The boy's cheeks flushed a deep red.
He spoke three words.
"Get. A. Haircut."
Another kiss took place.
________________________
I wrote a really bad version of this on paper for an english warm up,
but there were no homosexuals.
Would only cause issues with the teacher.
His fingers brushed it away gently, but it only fell again.
The tip broke on the end of his pen as he wrote.
"You know, it doesn't help that you won't get your hair cut.."
A boy sitting on the floor next to him spoke aloud.
He ignored him and continued on with his business, once more pushing away the bothersome hair.
"Please Cake, you don't eat..you don't sleep.."
The boy picked at the carpet as he said this.
He rubbed at his eyes, tired as anything.
"..."
The boy, glanced at the armchair.
He used to see him differently.
Not so much a skinny, mess of hair and ink stained hands,
but a friend.
His back quivered, his hands flew across the page.
"damn.."
He whispered.
"...out of paper.."
Finally he turned to look at the poor boy,
his face was a light pink and his eyes a dark red.
In the silence, the sounds of tears hitting the floor could be heard.
He reached his hand out,
his mouth opened as if to say something.
Comforting perhaps,
maybe a, "Are you alright?"
or, "Do you need tissue?"
The boy's shoulders began to heave,
a sob escaping his lips.
He pulled his hand back and he only watched.
Tear after tear fell.
His eyebrows came together.
They hit the floor.
He couldn't imagine what could have possibly caused this.
A whine.
"Hey.."
The boy looked up, his face a mess of wet and red.
"How about..a movie?"
The boy shook his head and stood, his eyes averted.
He stood as well.
The boy turned around and walked into the next room.
His white converse were kicked to side on the way, they had long since turned a dark gray.
He looked around.
He shut his eyes.
He opened them.
He look towards the door of the next room.
He knew what needed to be done.
The next morning,
he came down the stairs,
the boy was reading a novel,
his hand held a crushed tissue.
He walked into the room.
The boy didn't acknowledge his presence.
He took a couple steps forward,
his new shoes pinched so bad.
He lifted the boy's chin.
The boy's eyes fell on a well dressed brunette who looked like he had finally eaten.
His shirt was clean.
His pants were ironed.
His shoes fit.
As for His eyes, he still looked as if he hadn't slept.
He leaned forward and kissed the boy with the tear streaked face.
The boy's cheeks flushed a deep red.
He spoke three words.
"Get. A. Haircut."
Another kiss took place.
________________________
I wrote a really bad version of this on paper for an english warm up,
but there were no homosexuals.
Would only cause issues with the teacher.
And Joyce strikes out again!
Wednesday, February 4, 2009 9:47 PM
Finally, I have left him a comment somewhat worth reading.
Too bad it's so late in the game...
"What's the problem?
I dunno.
Well, maybe I'm in love."
Haha! Anyone remember that song?
Awh, I love it still.
I think about it everyday.
Cake, I'm thinking about you.
Little brother? Can you say, Cake?
Ca-ke! Ca-ke! This boy's name is CAKE!
C-A-K-E!
I'm given a smile in return, and although that's not what was asked of him,
it's enough.
I look at your photograph everyday.
Cake. C-A-K-E.
Your name is written on the inside of my palm.
I close my hand and I can feel the warmth coming from inside.
Although I'm not sure when you'll finally get to hear me say it,
it's enough.
Your words are beautiful Cake.
You're beautiful.
The world is beautiful because of you.
No one really knows that, except maybe..
me.
But,
that's enough.
I know no one reads my blog anymore, but I'm just going to go ahead and apologize.
To you, to me, and to all of the people.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry I haven't updated.
I'm sorry that you can't handle it.
I'm sorry you're too afraid to walk past me.
I'm sorry all the memories you have of me were at his house.
I'm sorry I can't change the way things are.
I'm so sorry.
To you, to me, and to all of the people.
I love you.
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