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Well-designed and clever disguise
We'll retreat to the bottom of the sea
We were destined to live out our lives
Underwater, you and me

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Hello, I'm 16 years old and am still finding myself. That is all.

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And this is why I deleted my blog.
Sunday, June 28, 2009 10:34 AM
I spy with my not so little eye...
4 coke cans,
3 coke caps.
1 coke zero cap,
a camera too nice for a crappy photographer like me,
27 dead gel pens,
and a beer bottle.

I listen with my normal sized ear...
Coldplay concert from a month and a half ago,
A best friend screaming, "L O L!"
and the air scrubber.

_____________________________________

Apparently someone in my household has reached the terrible twos.
8 months early.

10:31 AM
You're pretty ugly for being beautiful.
____________________________

Gotta get dat...
Friday, June 26, 2009 8:34 PM
Sham-Wow-Now!



We'll see her in a week won't we?
You're wasting your time.
What are you doing then?
_____________________________

I didn't shut the window.
It was you.
I wanted to keep talking.
I miss you.
I miss phone calls.
I miss being able to not miss anything expect a pair of socks.
Where's my morning breeze?
_____________________________

There's something about you.
I can't quite put my finger on it.
But then again, I don't think I'd want to.
Leave me guessing.
That's what you do.
And I love it.
_____________________________

And the desperate search began...
Wednesday, June 24, 2009 8:01 PM
all across the sea and land.

No matter how hard you try.
No one is ever good enough for themselves.
There will never be a point in someone's life where they can honestly,
truly, and openly say:
I love each, and every thing about myself.

The world just isn't the way it should be.

*hums circus tune*
7:53 PM
Baaah.
Me and my lazy ass ain't gonna do nuffin'.

Trumpets...
7:36 PM
play sick lullabies.

Skeletons sit around the table, teacups hanging from the pinky.
I can hear them chattering as I lay in bed.
Chattering of teeth, chattering of talk of life.
Of death, love, and of loss.
I lift myself from my bed, toes padding to the window.

Silence.

Eye sockets seem to turn in their skulls.

Trumpets begin.
Trumpets play sick lullabies.

Blink.

It's morning, I look in the mirror.

Disgusting.

I drift down to breakfast.
I don't eat.

The day progresses.

The night falls, I listen hard.
And finally, as the clock strikes 1 am.
The clicking of the dead wafts through my slightly open window.

A voice comes.
"Stop."

I wake, it's morning.
I don't eat.

The day progresses.

A voice visits me while I sleep.
"I just knew I'd find you here...I knew I'd find you here.."

I open my eyes.

A dull morning greets me.

I look in the mirror.

Nothing but bones.

I wasn't born to be a skeleton.

Like vines...
6:41 PM
we intertwine.

Wine.
Spilling from the hands of those who've had too much.
Overflowing glasses, hiccups, and faint blushes.

Sometimes you spill not only red wine (red blood?)
But spill secrets you never meant to leave your (red) lips.

_____________________________________

I've been dreaming,
I can't figure out why.
I must have stopped YEARS ago.
I don't mean 2 or 3 years.
I mean 7 or 8.

And I hate it.

_____________________________________

6:40 PM
Sometimes I feel so replaceable.

Mellow like a fine bottle of wine
Saturday, June 20, 2009 7:35 PM
Mellow like a fine fellow holding a pine.

Tree.

Perfect love casteth out fear
7:25 PM
when it rains, it pours
the worm turns
by the light of the moon
Acts like he fell off a turnip truck
in a twinkling of an eye
in love with life
wait with baited breath
she wears the pants
behind the clouds, the sun is shining
unkindest cut of all
It was swept under the carpet.
has the golden touch
talk in circles
up to the hilt
pie in the sky

Unwept, unhonored and unsung
7:20 PM

Why are so many cliches used in songs?

I'm just looking for my place in the sun.

He finds her so wonderful
he thinks she hung the moon.

But do you know what I think of you?

Your mother was a thief - she stole the stars in heaven and put´em into your eyes...

I just noticed how tan I am today
7:16 PM


I am so sick of my face.
I'm allowed to be sick of it.
It's my own god damned face.

Can't get off of this ride.
7:11 PM
There's not much to love.

I think of skinny people,
skinny books,
skinny sandwiches,
but sometimes.

Simple is best.

You...
7:06 PM
change your mind, like a girl changes clothes.

Whew, that last post left me with a bouncing leg.
And on my toes.
Now I need an unwinding post.

I like car rides, I love to lay down and sleep, wake up in a new place.
I like listening to music, crawling all over the place.
Music feels like little creatures crawling into my ears,
blowing puffs of lovely.
Creating different emotions.
I see them.
Poofs of red, pink, orange, yellow, green no.
Not green.
I'm not a leprechaun.

Alright, this isn't unwinding me any.
I'm going to stop before this gets too out of hand.

Splashes of random...
6:59 PM
all over your toes.

The Thought Train:
Choo Choo!!

A truck.
Fire Truck.
Backtrack, Busch Gardens, that train thingie that goes around the whole park.
Al, the guy who talked to us.
He looked like a cartoon character, and told us which seats where the best on the big roller coaster.
Thank you Al, you have done me good.
I see string, reminds me of Inuyasha, the one woman who made string or something come out of her nails I believe.
Razor sharp and invisible.
Isn't that just horrible?
Like death.
Death is horrible.
Death and all of his friends.
Get out of my head coldplay.
Hot.
Cold.
HotRun.
I have no idea, I thought about that this morning.
Where did Coldplay come from?
I don't know.
I like em.
They're cool.
But not that cool.
Hahhhh.
HHAHAHHAHAHHAHHHHH.
Justkidding.
Hunter needs to shut up.
And Dustin.
Coldplay is not gay.
Coldplay.
Cold.
Yes.
No.
In.
Out.
Up.
Down.
Wrong.
Right.
Black.
White.
Sorry, I wore a Katy Perry shirt yesterday.
I caught a lot of people looking at my shirt.
"They're not looking at your shirt.. *wink*"
Thank you for that Bryony.
Just build up more paranoia in my bleeding brain.
That's disgusting.
A bleeding brain?
Ugh.
Once I went from blood to poo to panic at the disco.
It all ends up there.
The world is confusing.
And large.
But not that large.
Come here world.
I need to have a word with you.
Odd.
Sorry I've just been itching to say that.



Okay.
I'm done with that. Have fun reading.

While Frank Sinatra sings Stormy Weather...
6:40 PM
the flies and spiders get along together.

A month?
Has it been?
Not quite sure.
I'm sorry blog.
I'm sorry for neglecting you.
You were my friend through many things, and I threw you away.
I'm so sorry.
______________________________________________

Trip to the beach, along with my mother, father and baby brother.
....hooray.
I expect sun burn and boredom.
______________________________________________

People tell me not to wish my life away.
I'm not, just the next two years.
I suppose something amazing could happen in that time, but..
why do I not believe that?

Lately my every day has been filled with contemplating, planning
and a lot of cleaning.
I'm just so.
Bored.

Bored.

Bored.

Bored.

Never a lie, just always quiet.

I need this.
Compare these pictures to drinks.
Something horrible has just happened.
You need it.


Little Miss Sunshine:
Don't apologize, it's a sign of weakness.

Shit.

I went through all your dirty laundry...
Monday, June 15, 2009 7:12 PM